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Thursday, December 4, 2008

Make It Snappy!

I’m going to be frank, there hasn’t been much going on in the Queen’s life lately. Nothing interesting enough to blog about anyways. There was one thing I found a little amusing today and that was the lady in the car behind me in the drive-thru line. Needless to say, I thought she was going to go apeshit. No, seriously.

It was five to eight and it was freezing cold this morning. I’m talking -3°F with the wind chill factor, the kind of cold that makes your nose hairs freeze. The heater in my car is cranked at full blast and I’m trying really hard to ignore how slow drive-thru is and I swear to myself, yet once again, that this IS thee LAST winter I’ll be living in Wisconsin. The car in front of me inches forward and I roll down my window so that I’m ready for the money-taking dude, who, I’ll have you know, shaves his arms (something I just don’t get).

According to the clock on my dashboard, it’s now two minutes to eight, which means I have exactly two minutes to get my ass to work. Nevertheless, I remain patient and start singing Feliz Navidad along with the singer on the radio. I stopped singing when I started to hear a voice, a voice which I knew wasn’t in the cheerful song. I glance into my rearview mirror and the lady behind me is screaming out the window and gesturing angrily. Faster than you can blink your eye, I turn the radio off and turn down the heat –there’s just no way I’m going to miss out on the opportunity to watch this shit. My life’s been so uninteresting lately, watching my fingernails grow is remarkable in my book.

“Aw, come on! Hurry up!” the irate woman shouts and throws her hands up. Hmph. Like I can make the service go any faster, lady. I stifle the need to smile at this point. A small part of me needed my daily dose of ‘interesting’, even if it were at the expense of some stranger having an utter meltdown. And for what? A fucking lousy Bacon Egg Cheese Biscuit? Nah…that couldn’t have been the reason. I’m sure the reason she was in a mad rush to get her food was for the same reason everyone else had; to get to work on time. Still...it was comical to watch her throw a fit like a toddler, and her yelling was twice as hilarious. And while I’m positive it wasn’t directed at me, I still have to thank her for not only giving me a laugh, but for providing blog fodder. It if weren’t for her, this blog wouldn’t have happened. So thanks, Psycho-I’m-Stuck-In-Line-Lady and remember, yelling and screaming isn’t going to get you anything but an ulcer.